Another hard day

Recectly, I just couldn't control my feelings well. I couldn't stop thinking of him. I wanted to write him badly but, then, when I think of he having good time with his girl, I just couldn't write him and know what's going on from his side and put myself in to deeper pain.

The idea of him being happy with another girl, like the way I used to feel with him is unbearable. I want to cry everytime when I think about this.

This year is so bad. Many things have happened to my life, mostly bad things. I don't know how long and how much I can handle them. Each thing makes me feel so depressed and I don't know how long I can control my emotion. People start seeing something's wrong.

I have isolated myself from others so I don't have to answer all those questions. It won't do any good to anyone or to myself. I'll just wait for all the things to go away by themselves. Nothing I can do or want to do. The sadness is just like the happiness. It comes and goes.